This article is one of those that you wish didn’t need to be written about. However here I am writing it anyway. So what is is that I’m going to write about here that I wish I wasn’t? Rope inflicted injuries! Rope isn’t safe, especially not suspension. However having said that it doesn’t mean that we should accept injuries as a matter of course, they should be few and far between. I am horrified when people shrug off injuries to models with an ‘oh well, these things happen’. Well once in a while maybe. When there are repeated injuries occurring it’s time to ask yourself some serious questions. When it comes to injuries some people are more ‘unlucky’ than others. Generally the better a rigger is the ‘luckier’ they tend to get. Bad riggers just tend to have more ‘accidents’ the more they rig. Now I would expect someone who has inflicted multiple injuries to stop rigging so much, to go and look at the common themes in these injuries, to work very hard to stop them occurring again. What I’m horrified to hear is ‘well these things happen’. Yeh, they happen to you don’t they? Can we guess why? When it happens to multiple models in multiple sessions you have to look for the factor that’s common to all the injuries. And that common factor is likely to be the person tying. In all the tying I’ve done, all the models, all the time, all the suspensions I’ve had 3 nerve injuries. Two of those I’ve identified the cause and can ensure that they won’t happen again. One I simply have no concrete idea, I’ve spoken to medical professionals, never had the same problem [...]
For many people it's a nerve-wracking step going out into the community especially to the myriad of events, workshops, munches and parties. This is especially because of uncertainty about what to expect and how to behave. Also how should they react to how other people behave? Here are a few things you should always be able to expect no matter what the event. To be treated with respect Not to be touched, slapped, spanked, groped, played with or otherwise molested without consent Not to have your personal space disregarded Never to be told that you 'have' to submit Not to be told how you 'should' behave To not have anyone make you feel uncomfortable or scared Here are a few rights that you should never forget you have or be made to be feel uncomfortable exercising You have the right say NO You have the right to your own opinion You have the right to disagree You have the right to be new and learning without that being held against you You have the right not to like some kinks, not everything's for everyone You have the right to completely disregard anything ever said by anyone who tells you you're not a 'true'... submissive, dominant etc. Common sentences beginning with or containing... All submissives/dominants are... All submissives/dominants should... All true... All real... Oh you're a natural... Oh you're not a natural... ...should be carefully analysed to determine their bullshit content. Many people come to kink via fiction of one kind or another. There's nothing wrong with this. Very many people do. Often these routes will include books, films, stories or fantasies... These things are very often not really true to life and in some cases present a very skewed view [...]
A friend today made a very good point about when he found things most likely to go wrong in rope bondage. And I absolutely agree with him on this. Often its when you’re doing the routine things, the small things, the things you’ve done a thousand times before. It’s in those moments when you’re running on automatic pilot rather than when you’re working on something on the edge where you’re focused and paying complete attention. You should be able to do some parts of your bondage completely without thought, you should know what you’re doing so well. The mistakes in things you have done a thousand times before happen not because you don’t know how to do it but because you are not focused. It is absence from the moment. It is something unregarded and considered unimportant. All things in rope bondage are important, from the first detail, especially from the first detail. Those brings me to the main point of this article. The need to be present in the moment. Now there is an apparent dichotomy in the concepts that you should know what you’re doing so well that you can do it without conscious thought and the idea that you must be present and focused in the moment. This dichotomy is however only apparent. There is a very big difference between having practised things so well that you can do them automatically i.e. that you have developed muscle memory for an action and by contrast, simply not paying attention to what you’re doing. When you are focused in the moment you are paying attention to all things including those things that you do automatically.
On another site someone went to the trouble of posting a little public message on my profile. I found it interesting for a couple of reasons. They must have really trawled to find my stuff. The site in question has adult content warnings that you have to deliberately turn off to see adult images. Given the layout of the site they must have seen 4 of my pictures before entering my gallery then had to look through another 20 pictures before reaching the point that they felt they had to comment and presumably then stop perving. Ugh, you and all the people on (site name removed) who take pictures like this are such CREEPS!!! ughhh.... And here's my reply to them. Hey, nice of you to give some feedback. If you look at most of the pictures in my profile you'll realise that the girl pictured here is in fact the photographer for the greater number of the pictures. What I'm saying is that we're partners and do what we enjoy as consenting adults together. That's our consent, not yours, your opinion, consent, thought or lack of is irrelevant. Also you might want to consider that you made an effort to come and find these pictures (how creepy is that?), no one made you look. So if this is truly distressing to you I'd suggest that you don't look. Unless of course you were looking for something to be outraged about? In which case happy to have helped. This btw . is the terrible picture that inspired them.I just found it funny really though it does make me wonder what it's like in some people's heads.